Two Blocks Square

Aw jeez, I hit Pony. I- his own flesh and blood- hit him. Right across the face. He drives me to the point of insanity sometimes- but you have to control it for your family. He's only fouteen and who knows where his mind is. I overreacted. The only way that we are allowed to stay together in one home, without parental supervision, is that we keep in line with the law. His he hardly ever comes home later than his curfew-midnight, so I should have cut him some slack.

And now I might never see him again. I couldn't believe that i had done what I did. It must have hurt because he just looked at me- his eyes all watery, and bolted out the door... just started running down the street. I began to yell after him with Soda but it did no good. His emotions took the best of him.

Sometimes I think that he should go to a boy's home, for at least a little while. To clam down and fully get over mom and dad dying. It would be good for him. He's a great kid at heart- he's worthy of a stable home- with a friendly bunch of people surrounding him. No matter how hard I try- I'm never going to replace his parents. He deserves better- like all of us do.

Soda has got everything going for him- he's got looks, brains... but he just doesn't realise it. And Ponyboy- from those good grades coming from school- he has to be quick-witted. But he never uses common sense in the situations that he needs it.

I need time to recouperate from this whole predicament and get some sleep......